Hi First Presbyterian,
School starts tomorrow, and I’m reflecting on some of the memories I’ve made this summer. While we were visiting Laura’s parents earlier this summer, we took our kids to a nearby creek. While Laura was with Esther and Clara, I sat with our two-year-old son Gabriel on the creek bed and threw rocks into the water with him. His main objectives were to see how big of a splash he could make with the rocks and to see how big of a rock he could pick up all by himself. I would help him un-wedge a rock from the sediment. He would take the rock and throw it was best as he could and then look for my reaction. I would encourage him, and then we’d laugh together. We were both totally content just being with each other.
I’m usually very achievement-oriented. I value progress and results. I think it’s one of my greatest strengths as a church leader. I also think it has a shadow-side that can undermine my leadership and my ministry to the church if I’m not careful. I can tie too much of my own identity into my pursuit of a goal, so that I feel like my personhood is reflected by my productivity.
Spending time with my kids during a moment of play reminds me that some of the most important moments in life have nothing to do with productivity or achievement. I wasn’t evaluating my son’s progress during our time at the creek. I wasn’t measuring the weight of his rocks or the distance of his throws. I was enjoying seeing his curiosity about the new things his body could do and his wonder about the creek. My love for him is based on nothing more than his existence. Isn’t this like the doctrine of grace? Our salvation and our relationship to God is based on nothing more than God’s unconditional love for us (Ephesians 2:8-9). Sharing moments of play are good for both my kids and for me. It helps them to feel a secure base in their most foundational relationship, which is not only good for their emotional, psychological, and social health, it also helps them to have a healthy God-concept. Not only does it help me grow my love for them, but it also helps me to connect with my inner child who (in many ways) is still trying to learn the lessons of childhood. Specifically, it reminds me that my value and worth as a person are not connected to my achievements or my productivity. My value and worth as a person are in my existence alone.
As the church program year begins and we look around our church and around our community, we will undoubtedly observe lots of work that needs to be done. Our actions as Christians communicate what we believe about God to each other and to the world. Let’s not neglect keeping our hands to the plow. Let’s not forget that God’s mercy and justice are communicated to the world through the church. But, let’s also not forget that God’s radical acceptance and love are also communicated through the church. Let’s not forget that we are made in the image of the God who is called “I Am,” not “I Do.” In as much as you remember to do God’s work, don’t forget to just be.
Peace to you,
Pastor Neff